The Shifting Waves of Gender Pronouns



Pronouns, like names, are used to identify ourselves. We have adopted the
use of pronouns as it is easier than having to keep referring to people by
their names. Pronouns hold a huge amount of significance in our language
because it tells us who we are.

The conventional approach to gender pronouns is fixed to a binary scale of
she/her and he/him. The majority of people accept the gender assigned to
them at birth which is dependent on the genitals they are born with.

With rising awareness, we’ve come to notice that there are people who do
not see gender as binary but rather as a spectrum, that gender and sex are
unrelated and that the sex of a person does not determine their gender. To
them, gender is how a person truly feels on the inside.

Gender Identity: A Breakdown

Gender identity is how one experiences their gender, it is a psychological
construct. When a person’s gender identity aligns with their sex, the term
cisgender is used. I, personally identify with my biological sex therefore I am
a cisgender and use ‘she/her’ pronouns.

Others may not identify with the biological sex that they were born with,
they strongly feel that they are a woman trapped in a man’s body or a man
in a woman’s body, the term for these people are transgender. Trans people
use pronouns that match their gender identity.

Non-binary people do not fit in the rigid category of male or female but
somewhere around it. Often, non-binary people use them/they pronouns.
Besides these, we have gender-fluid people whose gender is not constant
but invariably shifting, bigender who identify as both male, female, or a
combination of others. Agender people do not have any gender.

The Importance of Using the Right Pronouns

Like I have stated earlier, pronouns are used to identify ourselves, it tells us
who we are. Pronouns are especially important for the gender non
conforming community as they are subjected to an awful lot of
nonacceptance, discrimination and experience gender dysphoria; a state of
distress and discomfort because their biological sex and gender identity are
unaligned.

Our gender identities are very personal to us and no one can take that away.
By using the right pronouns, we show others that we see and accept them
Pronouns are a substitute of our names and so it is only fair that we use it
correctly, by that I clearly mean using and referring to others by the gender
pronouns that they specifically use.

Some people are extremely bitter for no reason like deliberately
misgendering and deadnaming others. It is so rude and tells a lot about you
as a person.

I remember some years back, a meme went viral that said, “I identify as an
apache helicopter” or something along those lines, used to troll trans and
gender-queer people. It is inhumane to ignore other people’s feelings like
that and especially over an issue as sensitive.

Everyone is different and has their own personalities and experiences, just
because a person does not fit in the general idea of gender that you grew up
in, does not mean that it is okay for you to dehumanize or discriminate.

Remember that even if you don’t personally believe in the gender spectrum
and hold on to the binary view, it is not an option to be disrespectful or
disregard how people feel about themselves. Let’s consider people’s feelings,
normalize the use of personal pronouns, ask people their pronouns instead
of assuming incorrectly, and overall, be kind.

Written by - Kim Houkip

Edited by - Anusha Vajha