Sitting at your desk and hoping someone notices your efforts doesn’t work as a career development strategy. “Talking does”.
Of course, nothing could be further from the truth. Speaking with people and being a good conversationalist are skills that, like any other, can be learned, practiced and improved.
It is not natural to live in a society where every discussion has the potential to turn into an argument, where our leaders are unable to communicate with one another, and where even the tiniest of problems have someone fighting both for and against it.
According to certain research, thousands and thousands of adults are more alienated and divided than they have ever been in history.
That’s why you need tools to become an Influential Conversationalist. Your talent and know – how will be the best kept secret without the ability to communicate those skills to others.
Are you talking enough to get where you really want to be in your career?
Here’s what you’ll discover as an Influential Conversationalist – daily interactions develop leadership potential.
Follow these life changing steps and you will be able to:
- Showcase your accomplishments and display confidence
- Develop a fanbase eat work that raises your profile and influence
- Communicate in a way that makes your conversations more effective
- Make yourself available for bigger opportunities
We form our first impression on someone within the first few seconds of meeting them - often even before you start talking. The majority of people believe that we do not make our initial impression until we begin speaking; however this is not the case.
Before you even begin the discussion, make sure you have an open and confident body language. Our brain tries to figure out if someone is a friend or a threat when we first meet them. You want to send out ‘friend' signals immediately away.
Here's how to greet people with open body language the moment they walk through the door:
- As you move near them, make eye contact or greet them
- When you see someone, you know or would like to speak with, smile cheerfully
- Make sure your hands are visible
- Relax your shoulders by rolling them down and back
For example: When I last went to see my maternal uncles, there was an introverted kid in the neighbourhood who never spoke to anyone. He sat in the corner of the family gathering. Our eyes glazed over a few times, and I eagerly approached him with two bottles of cold drink in my hands.
He was frightened to open out to people and told me that he finds my personality pleasant and that he wanted to hear about my experiences.
During talks, some of the most gifted conversationalists use a technique known as "bookmarking." This is a more advanced technique that I enjoy, but it does take some time to master.
When you use the bookmarking strategy, you add markings or emphasize a certain aspect of the dialogue in order to develop a stronger connection. Bookmarks are oral markers that you use to make it easy to follow up or have a topic to discuss in the future.
The many kinds are as follows:
1. Mention in the Future
Let's imagine you're chatting about conferences and someone says they'll be attending the same one in a few months as you. If you like the individual, say something like, "I'm heading there as well, we should have coffee after one of the sessions." This is a link to a bookmark that you may return to at a later time.
2. Inside Jokes
They are quite rare, but when they do occur, they are beautiful. Let's imagine you're having a conversation with someone and something fascinating or amusing occurs. You may make a bookmark and then refer to it later to relive the giggle.
3. Same-Same
A 'same-same' moment can sometimes be expressed verbally. When you both discover you share a similar passion, background, or commonality, it's called a same-same moment. You make a note of it by saying how strange it is that you share anything in common.
4. You Have to See
A follow-up mention can sometimes be used as a bookmark. While interacting with someone, I frequently bring up books, movies, or articles that I enjoy. “I'll make sure to Send you the link so you can check it out!” I'll say if they lift their eyebrows and look curious.
I enjoy doing this because I get to discuss something I enjoy, and people frequently respond with ideas.
Don't Compare Your Circumstances to Theirs
Don't compare your difficulties to theirs, or worse, tell them that their difficulties are nothing compared to yours. Every encounter is unique. And, more significantly, it has nothing to do with you.
You don't need to use that opportunity to demonstrate how terrific you are or how much you've been through. Conversations aren't a way to promote you.
For example: Don't start talking about the time you lost a family member if they're talking about losing a family member. Don't tell them how much you hate your job if they're talking about how much difficulties they're having at work.
Written By - Anjali Gupta
Edited By - Gunika Manchanda
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