“To say that a person feels listened to means a lot more than just their ideas get heard. It’s a sign of respect. It makes people feel valued.”
-Deborah Tannen
Have you ever had a conversation where you just “heard” what someone said? Yes! These words do make a difference. Hearing and actually listening do not have a similar meaning and it is really necessary to know the difference. Hearing, alone, is not enough. Actually listening and comprehending what is being said and why, reflecting on intentions, and considering the non-verbal part of communications makes an effective conversation. Listening is one of the establishments of society – it is the thing that empowers us to frame significant connections and associations.
A normal human spends around 70-80% of their waking hours in some type of communication. In spite of the fact that we invest 45% of the energy in listening, we don't generally listen as well as could be expected under the circumstances and regularly get diverted by different things in the general condition. Studies affirm that the vast majority of us are inactive listeners. Before understanding Active listening in-depth, let us have a look at the two types of listening i.e. Passive and Active Listening.
Passive Listening
Passive listening is hearing what is being said without necessarily retaining information. It is like exhibiting listening like behavior to the speaker but not necessarily trying to know the meaning. An example of this is when we fade out of a conversation because we either become distracted or disinterested in what the other person is saying.
Active Listening
Active listening involves paying attention to the conversation, not interrupting, and taking the time to understand what the speaker is discussing. Instead of focusing on what’s going on inside your head, you shift your focus to the speaker’s message.
Importance of Active Listening
“We should all know this: that listening, not talking, is the gifted and great role, and the imaginative role. And the true listener is much more believed, magnetic than the talker, and he is more effective and learns more and does more good.” — Brenda Ueland
And this is very wisely said indeed. Active Listening is a significant quality for anybody to create. This quality alongside different abilities, for example, basic reasoning and critical thinking are profoundly esteemed in the work environment by bosses and even outside. To expand your comprehension of the data given to you, you should be more compelling in your active listening ability. Listening has been demonstrated to be basic to imparting regard for someone else. To test this case, think about your own sentiments.
Consider when you may have been chatting with somebody who consistently centered around what they needed to communicate in the discussion. Perhaps obviously their mind was somewhere else and they weren't by any means "completely present" with you. At the point when we need to assemble a solid relationship with someone else, our capacity and responsibility to listening mindfully and empathically are fundamental.
How to Be an Active Listener?
Turning into an active listener is a unique cycle and lifetime interest. There is a whole lot more to undivided attention and to the numerous different abilities that will assist you with giving brilliant consideration to potential giver families and to discuss viably with your colleagues. Active listening fabricates solid connections and, while it may not fall into place for a considerable lot of us, it's significant correspondence expertise. Turning into an incredible audience will take assurance and practice and it will be well justified, despite all the trouble in both your expert and individual life.
There are plenty of active listening techniques that will improve the impression you can make and turn you into a better person as a whole.
Approach Each Conversation With a Goal of Learning: Take the person you are talking to as a teacher. Ask specific questions to seek clarification and this also helps to build a meaningful conversation. Don’t be overexcited and wait to disclose your opinion.
Keep Affirmations Coming: To keep the enthusiasm alive, participate in the conversation. Brief verbal affirmations like “I see,” “I know,” “Sure,” “Thank you,” or “I understand” can help a lot. Also, using nonverbal cues that show understanding such as nodding, eye contact, and leaning forward can make the person sense your interest. Small gestures like this help you pay back to the speaker talking.
Honest Feedback: “Was it a 10 out of 10? Let them know!” The same idea applies if there was an opportunity to get better. Speakers need to realize how they can improve their presentations. If you can see that a speaker has some trouble expressing a point or lacks confidence, encourage them, and share your views on how can things be made better.
Drill Down to the Details: Drill down to the details by asking order, explicit inquiries that center the discussion, for example, "Tell me more about...", "How could you arrive at this resolution?" or "How might this work?"
If you are a visual learner, check out this Ted Talk on How to Be an Active Listener
Conclusion
Do not underestimate the power of soft skills like active listening. Your CV or resume may look extraordinary, with a solid cluster of expert experience and preparing, yet businesses are likewise searching for individuals who can convey well with others. Active listening is significant social expertise that has an incentive in an assortment of social settings. Practice this expertise frequently and it will get simpler for you.
Read more: Essential skills for Working Professionals
Written By - Riya Garg
Edited By - Neha Kundu
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